Searching for the New Normal

We first heard the phrase, "new normal," when we lost our daughter Renee. When something that dramatic happens, life will never go back to the normal that it had been before. It's like going from a smooth flat road to a hilly winding road. Nothing about the two roads is the same other than the fact that they are roads. Nothing can be the same about life before and after those type of events other than it's still Life. Hills and switchbacks are normal for a mountain road, but if you found them in an otherwise flat landscape, that would not be normal.

We've found ourselves again searching for that road that will allow us to move forward. Normal has escaped us for the time being. We had been traveling along our normal path and suddenly found ourselves speeding along streets we could never have known were ahead of us. The hospital had become a sort of temporary Normal for us during the 7 weeks that Isaac spent there. But we knew that wouldn't be forever and we didn't want it to be either. When we got him home, we were in the process of moving to a new home, so things didn't get a chance to get used to being home again-let alone get used to having nurses in our home, boxes of medical supplies and equipment to figure out what to do with. Even when we moved, William stayed at my parent's so he could finish the school year, so we still weren't all together for most of the week.

Now we are all together in our new apartment. I am still trying to figure out where everything fits best, and we are still trying to make some kind of schedule that works for our family. Our winding street has merged into a massive junction of freeways and city streets and ours is a complicated path. I imagine there will be a few U-turns along the way. I feel like "Normal" is close, maybe on a parallel street, but, as with many street and highway systems, seeing where you are going is often a long way from being there. We are beginning to see what our New Normal will look like, but we still haven't figured out exactly how we are supposed to get there. One day, the things we struggle with will become second nature. Then I will feel like we have found the now elusive Normal.

Comfort Food

The fact that I can't fit any of the pants I was wearing when Isaac was lifeflighted to Primary Children's, is proof that I have indulged (perhaps more than I should have) in quite a bit of comfort food recently. There has been chocolate, ice cream, burgers that were much too big, creamy soups, pizzas, and big plates of pasta, however, some of the most comforting meals I had while in Salt Lake were omlets.

I don't know if this is strange to others, but for me, it is. I like a good omlet, sure, but overall, eggs just aren't really what I think of when I am looking for something to feed my stress and sorrows.

At least, they didn't used to be.

But of all the places we ate, the one I miss the most is The Blue Plate Diner. And the menu item that I miss? Yep, their omlets.

The Blue Plate. It's in this funky little building that looks like it's been added onto multiple times. It has rusty bikes chained up to the front of the building. It has an odd assortment of clocks and art from the community. When you walk in, they ask you to seat yourself. I wouldn't say the place is run down, but it's obvious that the experience is not about the atmosphere of the place. It's about the food. For me, it's about the omlets.

The first one I had was "The Benedict." Honey peppered bacon, cheddar cheese, and hollandaise sauce wrapped up in eggs and served with potatoes and your choice of bread. And oh. is. it. good! Something about the sauce smothering the warm eggs and bacon takes breakfast to a new level! And you know what's really great? Breakfast is served all day! So later when I had been craving an omlet all day, I was able to go (with my good friend Rachel) for dinner and try another omlet! At the time, I was very stressed, and looking for some comfort. And it came in the shape of an omlet. This time, it was "The Spanish." Cheddar cheese, onions, green peppers, salsa, sour cream, and guacamole. I am a big fan of avacado and have a hard time resisting anything topped with them, so the guacamole caught my eye. And the waitress said it is her favorite. There are not very many meals that I can recall sighing over. This was one of them. With each bite of this huge omlet, I felt the warmth and goodness of the meal sinking in and with each sigh, the tension I had been holding onto released. I had something I could enjoy during a time of immense stress.

I cannot say if this is the best meal I've ever had, but I can say it was the best meal I could have had that day. I'm sure that there are not many health benifits to eating a giant omlet smothered in cheese, but it healed my aching. I don't know how many stars a critic might give The Blue Plate Diner, but I know I'll go back again.